AGO Chapter 2

Age of Gods Online Chapter 2

Serena slowly opened her eyes at the sound of chirping birds. A sharp ray of sunlight hit her eyes, causing her to squint, before her brain finally woke up. She sat up, thinking it was the next day and cursing Alice for not waking her up yesterday.

How can she just leave me at school for the whole night? She thought.

As her foggy brain woke up even more, she realized instead of a different scenery, a different location than she should be in. She was sitting in bed, in a room surrounded by wooden walls. Not just any wooden walls, but log walls. The kind of walls you'd often see in western cowboy movies.

She looked around her. Above her was a roof made of long grass woven together. The wall on her right had an open window right in the middle, allowing her to see a garden where bean-like plants were being cultivated. Under that window in the same room was another bed made of wood, with stitched fur covering the straw seen poking out from underneath it. Right in front of her was a wooden door, crudely crafted from planks nailed together.

Serena considered it such a bizarre sight that she concluded she was dreaming. After all, she took a nap in her classroom so she couldn't have ended up in a place so bizarrely different. She thought it was possible that she was kidnapped, but if that was true, she would've been tied up when she woke up. Convinced that she was dreaming, she went back to sleep.

"Hello," a voice broke through her dream.

Serena opened her eyes slightly. Through her half-opened eyes, she spied a young girl, not much older than herself. She had shoulder-length dark brown hair, slightly wide mouth to be considered pretty, tanned skin and oval face. But what was most striking about her was her eyes.

It was red, like a ruby placed by a skilled jeweller in the center of white marble. Serena imagined the girl's eyes would glow in the dark if light were to be shone at it. It reminded her of her avatar in AGO, Aelrea of the Divine Arms, she had the same red eyes too. Her avatar's eyes even glowed. This girl's eyes reminded her of the mycra race, that she as the goddess Aelrea created as her kin in AGO.

But that couldn't be the case. AGO was a game. The girl in front of her looked very real. Serena pinched her thigh, winced in pain and figured she was probably not dreaming. So by process of elimination, she came to a different conclusion.

This girl is an albino, she thought.

She completely ignored the girl's dark brown hair and tanned skin.

"Umm, hi there. I bring you breakfast," the girl said.

Only now Serena realised the girl was carrying a plate in her right hand and a mug on her left. She had been too mesmerised by the girl's beautiful red eyes that shined like expensive ruby in solitaire cut to notice anything else. While the girl crossed the short distance to the table beside her bed, she placed both her burden on the table under Serena's watchful eyes.

"Eat up. I know it's not much, but I'm sure you can appreciate a warm meal after your perilous journey."

Perilous journey?

"Didn't you come from outside the valley? Grandpa found you collapsed by the side of the road on his way home from Rycius Watchtower."

Valley?

"Could it be... you don't realise where you are?" The tanned girl with ruby eyes bent over slightly, looking at Serena's face in worry.

“Umm...” Serena could've chosen any reply, but she was too overwhelmed by the vastly different scenery that she couldn't say a single word in response.

Seeing Serena's confused face, the girl said, "You're home!"

"Pardon?" Serena asked. In her mind, she thought this was certainly not her home.

"The Crimson Valley! The land that hero Lasrios tried to lead the mycra to! Oh wait, since you're a 'lost hammer', you probably grew up hearing it's original name, 'Valley of Snakes' instead."

Certainly, Serena have heard the name Lasrios and Valley of Snakes before. However, putting both phrases in one breath, brought into mind a possibility that she couldn't believe could be real. Added to the fact that the girl admitted that her people were called the mycra, it could only bring her to one conclusion. A conclusion which was simply impossible. Not even in fairytales.

So of course, Serena was in denial.

"You messing with me?" Serena asked with suspicion.

"No! This really is the promised land, it is the Valley of Snakes that the hero Lasrios said was prepared by Goddess Aelrea for us. He brought us here following our time of great need,” the girl said with much greater enthusiasm, even her face was flushed and her breath heavy from excitement.

What nonsense is this? I never did anything like that. Wait, this means... oh man, I'm getting a headache.

Serena indeed knew of a Lasrios, but that was in AGO. Lasrios was none other than one of her hero units. Serena had other hero units as well, such as Pegasus Knight Heriane and Guardian of the Forge Maristes. They fought Ukhlar together with her before she died and she could only assume they died as well afterward. Sword Brave Lasrios was the strongest of them all, even more than Spearmaster Gardi.

As Lasrios was the strongest hero, Serena as Aelrea equipped him with an S-class weapon that she created specifically for him, the cursed Blood Forge. It was a blade of immense power that it consumed the souls of its users to become stronger. She then sent him on a long term quest to defeat one of the players from the Theocracy of Lyrica, so he was too far to be recalled when Ukhlar the Scourge of Blood invaded the Aelrean Mountain Range.

Lasrios was deep in enemy territory, accompanied by only a handful of skilled mycras and a company of khalisian mercenaries. They were in a place called the Valley of Snakes. According to the girl, this place was called the Valley of Snakes once. If one were to assume that the game had somehow become a reality, that meant, this was the place he was sent to. If the game had become reality, then it would be safe to assume that just like this girl before her, Lasrios had also gained sentience.

That idiot probably misunderstood my reasoning for ordering him to come here. He probably thought I sent him here to invade it for the mycra's future expansion. I actually gave him that quest because the player who owned this land was weak. Oh Lasrios, there should be a limit to your achievements.

Serena was impressed at herself for creating such a resourceful minion. The actual reason she sent Lasrios to the Valley of Snakes was not to take the valley for her use, but to raise Lasrios's level by defeating a weak god. Then when he would be a lot stronger, she'd kill his character and have his soul consumed by the blade. This would hopefully raise the blade's level from S-class to SS-class. How could she have known he would misunderstood her intentions?

Of course, instead of using such a roundabout way to create an SS-class weapon, she could've forged an SS-class weapon from the start, just like how she forged the spear called, Drill of the Universe. Unfortunately, creating an SS-class weapon from the start had a very low chance of success, even for one of her skills and she wasted a tonne of resources to craft a successful one. When she crafted the Blood Forge, she no longer had the resources to spare.

"Didn't your parent teach you?" the girl asked again.

"Pardon?" Serena almost forgot about this girl standing next to her bed.

"Didn't your parents teach you about the Valley of Snakes? Even if you're a lost hammer, you must have heard them talk about it, right?"

"You kept talking about 'lost hammer'. Is that some kind of insult or something?" Frankly, it sounded racist in Serena's ears. She really hate racist people.

"Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't mean it that way. It's just what we call the mycras who have never set foot inside the Crimson Valley."

"What did you say?"

"We call people like you lost hammer because-"

"No, did you just call me a mycra?"

"Aren't you? What are you other than a mycra? Your red eyes that shine like ruby is telling enough."

Wait, my eyes are red? I'm a normal girl! My eyes are blue!

"But the real proof is in your blood," the girl said as she touched Serena's hand.

Hey, overly friendly girl. Just because I'm sitting helpless in bed, doesn't mean you can touch me so casually.

The girl wrapped her fingers around Serena's, before jolts of energy pass through the palm of Serena's hand, up to her arm then into her heart. As if in response, a stronger jolt then fired out of Serena's heart and transmitted through their linked hands into the girl. Both of them reacted to that pulse of energy in different ways.

"Ahhhnn, nooo..." the girl moaned while making a blissful face that could easily be misunderstood as something lewd.

As for Serena, she made a muffled moan and panted while thinking, I didn't know I swing that way too.

"What was that?" the girl asked while panting.

"How would I know?" No, I'm not gay.

"That was amazing!"

The hell are you saying?!!! Serena scolded in her heart.

"I never knew another girl could make me feel this way." Serena lamented this realization that everything she knew as fact was a lie. Cake. Her mind suddenly created an image of a cake.

"You must be someone talented!" The girl said with flushed cheeks covered by the fingers of her hands.

"This can't be real, I can't be bent." I'm not gay!!!

"I've never felt something so wonderful!" The face she was making could be easily misunderstood as something euphoric.

"Ai, it seems like life is not so straightforward as I'd like to believe," Serena said to herself as the cracks in her heart started to make way for acceptance.

"I think if you work hard, you can even be a master craftsman!" The girl exclaimed in a loud and excited voice to Serena who was in her own world.

"I may need to redefine my sexuality," Serena said as the cracks in her heart grew bigger.

"With your talent, I think you have a shot. What have you made so far?" The girl asked, totally unaware of Serena's inner turmoil.

"Excuse me? Were you talking to me?" Serena asked as she finally snapped out of her self-destructive thoughts.

"... Who else is here?"

"I thought you were talking to yourself. What were you saying just now?"

"I said your magic is so strong, you probably have the talent to become a master crafter. That pulse of energy just now was proof. All mycra can exchange energy that way, but your energy was amazing!"

"You mean that feeling just now, it wasn't love?" A ray of hope shined through the cracks of Serena's heart.

"Love? Why would you suddenly ask that?"

"Thank god! I thought I've become a lesbian!" Serena breathed a sigh of relief. Slowly, little by little, the cracks in her heart mended itself.

"Yes, thank Goddess Aelrea for your talent. There are many magic crafters from the hamlet, but you're far above them! You must be blessed. I think you should join the crafter's competition this year!"

"One thing at a time, my excited tanned... uhh... acquaintance. What do I call you?"

"Oh, sorry, I was too excited, I forgot my manners. My name is Iina."

"Serena," Serena introduced herself.

She entertained the thought of introducing herself as Aelrea, but considering Aelrea was the mycra's goddess, they probably wouldn't take kindly to someone using their goddess's name. Even though she was Aelrea in the game, they'd probably expect her to perform some kind of miracle, which Serena had no idea how to do at the moment.

Iina smiled wide, which, with her big mouth should've made her look like a clown. Instead, it made her look sweet and cute. "Then Serena, let me be the first to welcome you to Clear River Hamlet." 

Read more »

AGO Chapter 1

Age of Gods Online

Serena was a top player in the popular browser game Age of Gods Online which combined elements of strategy, action and RPG on a platform available to everyone with access to the internet. As an RMT scum, she climbed the ranks of the deathmatch with real world money. One day, after she was defeated in battle by another player, she went to sleep and woke up in the world of AGO.

But something was terribly wrong. She woke up 300 years in the future of the current Age of Gods Online. Will she be able to unravel why or how she get there and if she'll ever return home?

Age of Gods Online, otherwise known as AGO, combines the age-old system of browser-based massively multiplayer online game with the catchy action gameplay popularized by gaming consoles. Launched in 2019, it takes full advantage of the rise of mobile gaming to deliver an enjoyable, fully immersive MMOG that allows any user to play the game regardless of hardware specifications or gaming platforms. All one needs to play the game is just an internet connection and a platform that can open web browsers.

Due to aggressive marketing strategy and their catchphrase, "You are not PLAYING a god, you ARE a god", their player base skyrocketed to 200,000 players in just a week. An impressive feat for a company renowned for making mediocre games in the past.

******

"Foul servants of the evil god! I, Guardian of the Forge Meristes shall halt your advance!" the hammer-wielding woman in fire-resistant coat announced before dozens of premium soldiers delivered blow after blow. Despite her great skills and the honour granted as Guardian of the Forge, not even she could handle the attacks from a hundred premium soldiers. Left with not being able to perform her main attack, she could only defend with her oversized hammer.

Suddenly from behind, a blade of light swept up the enemies around her. The blade of light cut cleanly through their bodies, cutting off their source of life. With that blow, they returned to their original forms, armoured statues imbued with life at their gods' commands.

"Went too far. You could. Die," a mechanical voice came out of the suit of armour that came up behind Meristes. It was the Mechanical Knight Alou, the only living armour crafted by the hands of its goddess, Aelrea of the Divine Arms.

"Everyone, do NOT allow them to advance any further! Even if you die, you will stop them here. Heriane, keep the premium dragon occupied. Eri, I will need you to sacrifice yourself to stop the blood corona," Aelrea of the Divine Arms commanded. 

Just like her heroes, even she had suffered multiple wounds, mostly from having to deal with the siege weapon blood corona. Without minding her wounds, she said to herself, "If only Gardi is here, he would be able to deal with those pesky blood coronas easily." It was because Spearmaster Gardi was armed with Spear That Drills The Universe, an SS-class item that ignored all defense, physical or magical.

"Yes, my lord. Come, my trusty steed!" Pegasus Knight Heriane flew to the sky, riding atop her mount, the silver pegasus.

"For the goddess!" Forgemaster Eri ran towards the throng of premium soldiers before jumping to the air and throwing her twin storm hammers at the concentration of blood coronas, weapons capable of leveling whole cities if given the chance.

"As the goddess wish. Taste my hammer, foul creatures! Forge of the Sun!" Guardian of the Forge Meristes cried as the head of her hammer became a brilliant ball of light. When she smashed the ball of light on the ground, everything within the range of two miles turned to ash.

"Command accepted. Will comply." Mechanical Knight Alou rushed forward, its thick armour became the hammer that smashed against all the premium soldiers in its way. Its multiple gun ports firing on multiple targets at the same time while its flaming missiles sought scorched miles of land.

While this was going on, Aelrea pulled up her inventory. She was planning to summon her two premium items, the premium wyverns and the premium flame dragon. Unfortunately, before she could use either, a single blade cut off her neck from behind. 

"I've been waiting for you to send your heroes away. Too bad, Serena. It's my win this time. Hahahaha!"  

Serena had to fight the urge to throw her phone to the floor. She had just lost a battle against Ukhlar, the Scourge of Blood and she feared this had kicked her out of the deathmatch, despite having a lot of cash items still unused. The idea of losing all the premium jewels and items she just bought yesterday annoyed her to no end.

"Damn you, Steve. There should be a rule against using so many cash items in one battle. Bloody RMT scum." she cursed.

RMT refers to 'real money transaction' in which players spend real world money to get ahead in an MMOG. 'RMT scum' refers to the type of players who rely on RMT to be on top. To be fair, Serena had no right to find fault in Ukhlar's method. After all, she too was an RMT scum right up to her defeat.

An incoming message chimed as she was contemplating how best to pay Ukhlar, the Scourge of Blood, otherwise known as Steve Weisz for this latest humiliation.

Marc: Congratulations!

Serena: About what?

Marc: For getting to Top 5.

Serena: But I just lost.

Marc: Saint Klaus was killed about a minute before Ukhlar killed you, so now Saint Klaus is kicked from the game and you're locked at 5th Rank. I wonder how the devs are going to run the game now. Heard you guys will be transported to a smaller area to encourage conflict.

Serena: Where did you hear this?

Marc: Dev diary. They said the game will be in lockdown until Sunday to manage the updates.

Serena: You sure?

Marc: Yes, very sure. You can check it yourself.

Serena: Maybe later. I'm still at school.

Marc: Detention?

Serena: Any other reason I'd still be at school this late?

Marc: lol How about we go on a date this Saturday? Your exam's already over, right?

Serena: You got a job yet?

The silence went on for four whole minutes.

Marc: Alright, give me another lecture, my heart is ready.

Serena: I already told you I won't go on a date with an unemployed man. You want another date, get a job.

Marc: But I do have a job, I'm a full time gamer

Serena: A job that makes money. I don't even mind if you get a job as a street vendor. If you want a date, make your own money, not wasting your parents' money.

"Bit rich coming from someone who spends her allowance like water," a girl spoke behind Serena, making her jump on her chair.

"Alice! Since when were you behind me?" Serena asked with a bit of fluster.

Alice grinned as she said, "A few minutes. You were too busy chatting with your boyfriend to notice."

"That shut-in is not my boyfriend."

"Oh really, then why do you look so happy every time you reply his messages?"

"You - no, this... You're freakin' blind, Alice."

"Oh, he replies," Alice said as she chuckled at Serena snapping her head around to look at the screen.

Marc: But if I become a street vendor, you'll be too embarrassed to be seen with me.

Serena: Excuse me, my father's first job was a roast beans street seller. My mom's first job was a shop assistant. Daddy made it very clear that no job is shameful while I was growing up. You were there during such lectures. How do you expect me to introduce you - as whatever - to my parents when you don't have a job?

"Ooh, you're already at that level?" Alice teased with a giggle.

"Go away, Alice," Serena said in annoyance while shooing Alice away with her left hand.

"Sorry, no can do. I want to borrow your phone," Alice said while looking slightly embarrassed.

"What happened to yours?"

"Confiscated. Mom said I played AGO too much. That's why I'm ranked at 23. I wasn't able to play."

Marc: If I get a job, will you go out with me?

Serena: Get a job first, then we'll talk.

Marc: Got it.

"Here," Serena said as she handed her phone to Alice.

"Thanks! I know I can count on you!" Alice said as she logged in to AGO sandbox. "How was the boyfriend?" Alice asked while her finger danced on the surface of Serena's phone.

"He's not my boyfriend," Serena denied while looking out the classroom window from her seat.

"Oh, so that's the setting, huh? Older neighbour boy, fallen hard and a young girl who's in denial?"

"I'm not in denial. I'm just helping him get back on his feet," Serena argued without looking at Alice.

"By being his girlfriend?" Alice asked, her eyes locked on the screen and her fingers busy tapping everywhere.

"If it's necessary."

"Yeah, it's not like you're in love with him or anything, right?"

"Right!"

Alice chuckled. "Yeah, it's not like that shut-in who smells bad, rarely change clothes, lives in a dumpster and-"

"Don't diss Marc!"

"But you don't love him. So what's the big deal?"

"I'm the only one who can talk smack about him. You can't!"

"Ooooh, possessive much?"

"Whatever, just put it back in my bag after you're done with it. I'm catching up on sleep," Serena said as she buried her face in her arms on the desk.

"Yes, yes, your highness," Alice said as she used up the accumulated faith in the sandbox to stick some guard towers at her border, "You know it's really sad that detention is just another word for 'nap time' considering the teachers don't even bother to watch us. Alright, I'm done! Here you - Serena?"

Alice looked behind her, at Serena's seat, which was empty of all life and presence.

"Are you sleepwalking again?" Alice asked the empty chair. 

Read more »

Felicia's Second Life Prologue Book 2

A Metrune Daughter's Decision

“You have free time until dinner. Go have fun,” my lady Felicia said to me.

“Eh?” It was so sudden that I couldn’t understand her command.

“Go have a meal, pick flowers, watch street performance or kill someone. Anything that makes you happy.”

But what makes me happy is being near you, my lady!

Certainly, I wouldn’t dare say that to her. So instead, I said, “My duty is to assist you, my lady.”

“Nothing you can assist me with right now. I’m just training with the spear sentries.”

“Go have fun, Lili. I don’t want to see you until dinner time, understood?” my lady Felicia said to me as she tested swinging the carved wooden stick that functioned as training swords among the spear sentries.

I know my lady didn’t say that out of spite, but her words still made my eyes moisten. I turned my face down so that my lady couldn’t see my eyes that was about to break into tears. Without letting her see my face, I bowed and said, “As you wish, my lady. If you need me, I will be at the baron’s mansion.”

“Okay, I’ll be back by dinner time,” my lady Felicia said as she turned towards the spear sentries, “Alright, everyone! Today we’ll be doing sword spars. Pick your partners and practice for half an hour. Then we’ll swap partners. Merisa, you’re my first partner.”

I left my lady Felicia as Merisa nodded her consent. I would very much have liked to be my lady’s first sparring partner, but what could I say when she explicitly told me to disappear? What if my lady told me she didn’t want me around anymore? What would I do then?

I don’t want to live in a world without my lady Felicia.

Without realizing it, I have already arrived at the mansion. Unlike the other noble mansions in Forlendia, the Metrune’s mansion only has one front entrance, and that was the main entrance that we use to come and go regardless of our status. Of course, there were other doors, leading out, but the lord had very specific commands regarding entry and exiting.

There was no such thing as ‘servant entrance’ as the lord told everyone to come and go from the front door. The mansion was designed in a reversed horse-shoe shape. The mansion’s main building was what most people would see, it was where the lord’s family lived in. Behind the main building were two long buildings. The western arm was where the horse stable, storage area, tool shed and kitchen area located at. The eastern arm was the servant quarters, where mother and I, as well as Fariha and Sul live in. It was separated into five fairly spacious rooms. All the buildings opened up towards the central garden between the three buildings where there was a vegetable garden and two rows of flower bush.

I knocked on the main door twice to inform whoever inside that I was coming in. Then I opened the door and entered, only to be greeted by the serious faces of my mom, the lord and lady and Fariha. Fariha was holding in nursing her cute baby, which the lord as the father, named as Rukacia Sekany Metrune. They were all sitting at the dining table, with the lord sitting at the head of the table.

What’s with everyone? Did I do anything wrong?

The Lady Latreia spoke first. “Lili, where is Felicia?”

Oh no! Am I going to be scolded for coming home without my lady?

“She’s with the spear sentries, my lady. I’ll bring her home right away-“

“No need,” Lady Latreia cut me off, “Sit, Lili.”

Mom gestured for me to sit next to her between her and the lord. I thought it was inappropriate, but I sat there anyway. On the opposite side of the dining table was baroness, Lady Latreia and Fariha. As I sat, Lady Latreia gave me a complicated glare.

I have no idea what’s going on. Lady Latreia has never shown such a face. Is it anger? Is it dissatisfaction? Is it disapproval? I don’t know. I have never seen Lady Latreia looking other than slovenly or bored.

I sent a glance to mom. She patted my hand gently and gave me a soft gaze probably to calm me. What it actually did was making me more nervous instead. I had a feeling this matter concerned me greatly.

“Lili, you probably know this, but you are aware that this baby is my daughter, correct?” the lord gestured to the baby in Fariha’s arms.

“Yes, my lord,” I said in confirmation. How could I not be aware of it? I was there alongside my lady and mom when we heard the baby’s first cries almost two days after we returned home from Lytis.

“Is she beautiful?” the lord said with a smile.

“Yes, my lord.”

“Get to the point, dear,” Lady Latreia said.

“Patience, Rhea... well... Lili, I’ve decided to formally recognize Ruka as my daughter,” the lord said with the face that made him seem unsure of himself.

What does that have to do with me, though?

“Well, Lili, would you like to be one of Ruka’s older sister?”

Oh... so the lord only wants me to take care of Lady Ruka. I got nervous for nothing.

“If it’s only that, of course-“

“AHHH!!! I can’t take this anymore!”  Lady Latreia suddenly shouted.

“Rhea, these things need to be done slowly.”

“Tell her straight or I’ll tell her myself, dear. You know I don’t have patience for things like these.”

What’s going on? Did I assume wrong?

“Uhm, Lili... your real name is... Lilicia Selthiere Metrune.”

Huh?

Mom held my hand tighter.

Looking a little pale, the lord continued, “You are a daughter of Metrune, the union between Suin and I, almost 12 years ago. You are Felicia’s older half-sister, by a few minutes.”

The world paused for me in that instant. The words ‘daughter of Metrune’ and ‘older half-sister’ continued to ring inside my head. For hours, maybe days, may years, maybe decades, my mind kept replaying the words over and over again, as snapshots of my time with my lady continued to play in my eyes. Eventually, the words ‘Felicia’s older half-sister’ settled and the world started moving again.

I was at a loss for words.

“I intended to officially declare Ruka as my daughter, but my wife Rhea pointed out the very valid problem. It was that I never admitted that you were my daughter. It would be unfair if I declare my youngest daughter as a Metrune child when I did not do the samefor my eldest daughter – are you alright, Lili?”

“No no no no...” I shook my head with both hands holding the sides. This was too much for me to take. All this time, I thought my father was dead in a war. How could I possibly imagine that my father had been by my side the whole time? How could he make me believe that I had no father? How could mom even allow this?

“Lili,” the baroness’s voice sounded so close to me. She was standing between me and the lord, with one hand on my shoulder.

When did she get here?

“Walk with me, Lili,” the baroness said while standing there waiting for me to get up.

Slowly, I pushed the chair backward and stood up. I looked at mom and she just nodded to me. Then the baroness glided away from the dining table and towards the front door, looking unnaturally elegant all of a sudden.

“Go,” mom urged me, “We’ll be here when you get back.”

I approached the baroness who waited for me in front of the door. Without even putting on her walking cloak, the baroness opened the door and walked out into the evening sun. I followed close behind before she told me to walk beside her.

“Lili, do you have a problem with becoming a Metrune's daughter?” she asked a few moments after I started walking beside her.

“No, it’s not that, my lady.”

“Are you afraid we will take you away from your mother?”

I’m not afraid of being apart from mom. I’m not a child!

“No, it has nothing to do with that, my lady.”

“Are you afraid you will have to call me ‘mom’ instead?”

“Eh? No! I would be honoured, but I don’t deserve it, my lady!” I denied vehemently.

“So it is as I thought...” she let her words trailed off.

“What is it, my lady?”

She stopped suddenly. Then she turned towards me and with both hands on my shoulders, she said, “Even if you’re not sisters, nothing can happen, Lili.”

Eh? What is she talking about?

“Felicia is a noble lady, Lili. She must marry one day. No matter how much you love her, it will not bear fruit. You can’t expect your relationship to work.”

“How-” I closed my mouth as soon as the word left my lips.

“Fufufu, who do you think I am? I am the baroness. You’re looking down on me too much, Lili. I know everything.”

Amazing! The baroness is too amazing. I’ve kept this secret for so many years, not even mom or my lady Felicia knows about it.

“You don’t have to say anything, Lili. In front of me your secrets are so plainly naked, it is as if you’re not wearing any clothes at all. But let’s get back to the topic, won’t you become a Metrune’s daughter, Lili?”

“I-I don’t want the relationship between me and my lady Felicia to change, my lady.”

“You know you can’t be together in the way that you want, don’t you?”

“But... if I become a noble lady, I will one day be married off... It’s okay if my crush is never answered, my lady, but please, allow me to stay by my lady Felicia’s side.”

I knelt with both knees on the ground as I begged the baroness. I only had one wish, and this was the only wish I hope to be fulfilled. I could not dare ask for more. Just this wish, please allow me this one selfish wish. I will never ask for anything else.

“Fine, then. Let’s go back. We’ll think of something that can work for you,” the baroness said as she helped me up.

“Ah, my lady, please don’t tell anyone about this.”

I will die of embarrassment if mom knows about this.

“Suin already knows, actually.”

My mouth opened wide in shock. “Why did you tell mom, my lady?!”

“Well, I didn’t... that was... heheh... that was... too funny... hehehe... hahahaha.” The baroness suddenly broke into laughter as she slapped the trunk of a tree. Her laughter continued for almost ten minutes when the lord came out looking confused at the baroness who laughed against the rose bushes with her hands slapping the trunk of a soft-wood tree.

In the end, it was decided that my status would be recognized as a daughter of Metrune by the name of Lady Lilicia Sethiere Metrune. The formal family tree would be updated and a copy would be sent to the royal capital for archiving. My status as a daughter of Metrune will not be publicized except to other nobles and I could continue to masquerade as attendant to my lady Felicia. Needless to say, my lady Felicia would never know that I was her older half-sister.

Of course, I also made the baroness and mom swore to never tell my lady Felicia about my feelings for her.

Previous Chapter | Next Chapter

Read more »

Felicia's Second Life Chapter 9

The Horse, The Bath & Everything In Between

Good morning, everyone! It's me, your beloved and most adorable Lady Felicia again. How are you all doing? Did you miss me? I'm sure you did! But don't worry, after three months of waiting, I'm finally here again. Yay me!

Why aren't any of you clapping? Clap, now! Anyone not clapping at my appearance will be dumped into the Mrun River. You! I see you're not clapping. How dare you! But I'll let it go for now, hmph!

Why? Because I'm in a good mood.

It is now spring and the whole valley is covered in flowers. Yes, flowers! I don't know if it's anything I did - no, it's definitely something I did - but this year, the whole barony is covered in flowers.

Blue, red, yellow, white and even purple! On the roof, in front of houses, along the paved road and even on the mountains! The whole barony is a flower garden! Even when you hide in your house, you can still smell the fragrance of flowers. This calls for a flower festival. Come to think of it, let's do just that!

******

The moment I went out this morning, I was greeted by the sight of a beautiful white horse. Its reins tied to the fence of the flower patch in front of my house. It was chomping on the petals and leaves of my beautiful flowers.

"Pest-Sul, why is this horse eating my flower garden?

"Sorry, big sis. A messenger from the House of Melstad arrived earlier with the horse in tow. He's off to have breakfast at Felicious. He told me he'd be right back. He also told me that the horse is Melstad property and it is not to be harmed."

I gave Sul a glare. In exchange for me not making a fuss about her being mother's pet kitten, it was agreed that she would be employed as our maid-in-training. She was placed under Suin's supervision, though her primary duty was taking care of my flower garden.

I did try to bully her a bit by making her wear cat ears and a cat tail, which I had the tailors sew quickly at double pay. She took it in stride though and never complained. This cursed object's positivity and optimism is so terrifyingly bright. Of course the cat ears and tail only made her more adorable in mother’s eyes. Mother is so weird.

So in all appearances, she became Cat Maid Sul. That was the only way I would agree to her becoming our household maid. Besides, Fariha was still weak from her recent birth, so having Sul around would most definitely help Suin with the housework. It won't be a problem even once Fariha returns to work. Unlike before, we can now afford to hire three maids, we can even afford to hire ten more maids now, but let's not go that far. We can't afford nine more babies because father can't control his urges. If Suin weren't a former assassin, father would've probably had a baby with her too.

Anyway, let's deal with the immediate issue.

"You!" I gave the horse a glare.

The horse ignored me.

"Stop eating!"

The horse continued to ignore me.

"If you do not stop eating my flowers, I will turn you into horse stew."

Still ignoring me.

"Have it your way," I said as I came close to the horse but before I could grab its reins, it turned around and kicked me with its hind legs.

If not because of my Tea Party, a pair of high strength steel bracers blued to perfection, I would've broken some bones at least. Just look at the bracer on my arms. It is steel and yet it is dented! Sure, the dent is shallow and not very noticeable but it's a dent nonetheless. Is this someone's attempt at assassination?

If this is a Melstad's horse, are they trying to kill me? Could it be that I'm a threat now and my own relatives are trying to do me in? If so, say it to my face you ungrateful cousins! Or maybe ungrateful uncles or aunts. Don't make me regret bringing you home from Lytis!

I took out my gun, the Mark VII Double Barrelled Boomstick from its holster and aimed it at the horse.

"Apologize or I make a hole in your eye," I said to the horse.

"Waaaaiiiitttt!!!!" a loud voice cried from the main road leading to town proper.

I looked at the direction the voice came from and saw a man on horseback galloping in my direction.

"Please, my lady," the man said once he dismounted, "Please do not kill the horse, it's a present from Master Feras Meruin Melstad, my lady."

He handed me a letter. Written in flowery words with the smell of roses and metaphors that I found hard to understand, I skimmed through it and then tore it to pieces.

What is this garbage?

"Ah... my lady..." the servant looked at the pieces of paper on the ground.

This is why I don't like you, you know? If you want to say something, just freaking say it! Don't go with such a roundabout way about it.

"So basically, this is a gift for me from that idiot, right?"

"I'm not sure who is the idiot you're referring to, my lady, but yes, this is a gift from Master Feras.

"I see, then I can do whatever I want with it, right?"

"Yes-"

"Good!" I said as I raised my gun again.

"Wait!"

"What now?"

He knelt on the ground with his forehead touching the dirt. "Please, my lady. If it's known that master's gift was shot dead within a minute of being received, I will be in a very bad position, my lady. Please have mercy on me."

"Tch!" I walked up towards the sickly pale horse, while watching out for its hind legs. I stood in front of the horse, between it and the fence its rein was tied to. My gun hung low in my hand.

"Thank you very much for your consideration, my lady. I'm sure this will go a long towards maintaining a good relation between the houses of Melstad and Metrune, my lady."

I could see the horse smirk.

I patted the soft white fur of the sickly pale horse as I said, "Certainly, I wouldn't want to cause any friction between us and grandfather and I look forward to continued good relations with the House of Melstad. Of course, I wouldn't dream of hurting such a beautiful equine."

The horse neighed a laugh.

Then I pressed the nozzle of the gun at the horse's throat. "Did you seriously expect me to say that, you dumb horse? AH?"

Startled, the horse attempted to pull back, but with the rein tied to the fence, it couldn't go far. I just pressed the barrel even deeper into its throat.

"Would you like me to prepare it for dinner, my lady?" Lili asked suddenly.

"Oh no need. No need at all. You hear that, you stupid horse? Lili offers to prepare you for dinner. But I'm thinking of roasting you myself. Your hind legs look delicious. Bet you regret kicking me just now, huh?"

The horse breathed hard as it pulled even harder in an attempt to get away.

"You think I won't kill you, is that so? You think I'm afraid of grandpa, don't you? Well, tough luck. I can’t give a damn! Become nutrient for my body, dumb horse!"

Right before I was about to press the trigger, I felt something give away behind me. The fence came flying when the sickly pale horse pulled even harder, hitting me in the back. The wooden fence broke into pieces against my back, releasing the reins, which ended up tangling at my feet.

"Gyaaah!!! Stop you damned horse!" I cried as the horse carried me away by my feet with Lili chasing after me.

******

"Huff huff, stupid horse. Making me dirty so early in the morning."

"Huff huff, what an agile horse. It could avoid my thrown knives so easily. I offer no excuse for my failure, my lady."

"Huff huff. You tried your best. Next time I see that stupid horse, I'm definitely putting a bullet into it. What's with you these days, though? It's like you're in a daze these days."

"I'm sorry, my lady. It's nothing, please don't worry about it. So what's the plan now, my lady?"

"Same as we do every day. Let's go visit the school."

"At least we're not far from the school."

"Small blessings."

We arrived at the school just as our single full-time school teacher, Ms. Collie opened the door to admit the students into the classroom. Unlike formal schools in my former world, schools in this world are not mandatory and even discouraged in certain parts of the region. In my old world there was a saying that "An uneducated populace is easier to cow, easier to control, and easier to enslave." Perhaps that is why education is not a big thing here.

I don't really care about enslaving people through withholding education. I need my population educated so that I can make them do even more things for me. There are plenty of ways to enslave people. Keeping them dumb is a short-sighted person's folly. Like every noble of the land, of course I want complete obedience from my populace, but I don't have to be a dick about it.

True, an uneducated workforce is easier to control, but an educated workforce is more useful when controlled. You can quote me on that.

The school was actually one of the two workshops on my small strip of land. It was a little bigger than three peasant houses placed next to each other. At full use, the first floor of the workshop could comfortably seat 60 children in one class, though it could fit 100 children at the same time if comfort wasn't a concern. The second floor was added a week after class started and classes there focused on teaching practical skills such as medicine refining, sewing and woodworking.

With the sudden increase in population after the trip to Lytis, we had a lot of people with no home and no jobs. I asked the original peasants of the barony to allow the homeless newcomers a place to stay in their homes while we built the new boarding house out of bricks and concrete.

Now, bricks and mortar are well known in this time period. Many castles and buildings were already made with fired mudbricks and mortar, alongside other materials such as limestone and granite. What they didn't have, was concrete. With the mountainous landscape of Mruna and the shortage of timber, building out of bricks and concrete was significantly cheaper and sturdier. Without a need to import wood, the boarding house was made almost entirely of concrete and hollow bricks, making construction a lot faster than if it had been single blocks of limestone or similar. If you must know, the boarding house was built based on French Baroque architecture since it was meant to be an inn after we have given every newcomer a home. I probably went overboard with the scale again, though. It had become as big as a small castle.

I really should learn to tone things down.

The sudden increase in population prompted the barony-wide policy of planting flowers at each home. It was following my fears that the sudden population boom would cause squalor and disease. I knew enough about the Black Death and I didn't plan to start it here. I know at a population of 800 adults, it wasn’t big enough for Black Death to come knocking, but it wouldn’t hurt to be careful. Every home received a small amount of seeds for them to grow mint bushes in front of their homes. They could also grow other plants from cuttings they got from the wilds, but some with a little bit more money could choose to buy already rooted cuttings from me, for a small fee (lol).

Yup, some of our people have money now. With the increase in population and industry, Mruna is seeing the rise of the first middle class citizens right now. With more people than space, we're also seeing the former serfs merge their dwellings into one large multi-storey housing block. That's right, Mruna is getting its first apartment blocks too.

Of course, that was all following my suggestion, modeled after the large five-storey boarding house which also housed my Felicious Ride-Through Restaurant. Don't worry, I was aware of the risks involved with early apartments, so I formed a group in charge of inspecting the safety of the apartments every month, headed by me, the Chief Building Inspector.

Any plans to build an apartment block have to first be drawn on a piece of paper. Since most people can't read or write, they had to pay those who can read and write to prepare their documents, which prompted the formation of the Copywriter's Hall, headed by a formerly imprisoned scholar from Lytis. Then they would send it to me for approval to start building. Most of the earlier plans were denied as they did not specify worker safety precautions, materials used and effect on neighbourhood traffic. The placement of drainage and sewage pipes had to be included too, although they couldn't understand why those were extremely important to being approved.

The very first proposal was only a single-page paper with a rough sketch of a three-storey building with the words "This is good!" I stamped 'denied' all over the page in response until it the paper was almost completely black. Thankfully, after I gave a basic guideline of what to draw and what to write, the proposals after that were more acceptable. It did require a bit of urban replanning though. Some families had to be relocated to new homes to allow expansion of roads in order to avoid the inevitable heavy traffic in the town's center.

During construction, as Chief Building Inspector, I had to do actual inspections to ensure that the building methods and precautions were safe for builders and eventual tenants. After that, they had to purchase additional flowers for each floor of their apartments, and they had to purchase them from me, the barony's Botanical Director. After that, they had to register their building to me, the City Planner and if I deemed their building to be unsafe for habitation, they wouldn't be allowed to rent it out to anyone.

So with all these new stuff, can you see why I want an educated population so that I won't have to do everything myself? Sure I have my friends, but they all have other things to do. I have plans for them, being urban development officials isn’t one of them.

"How was yesterday, Ms. Collie?" I asked when I entered turned the corner at the new school. Like many educated people here, Ms. Collie was from Lytis and one of the imprisoned captives thrown out my way. In Lytis, she was imprisoned for obstructing civil officials, at least according to her when she applied for the job of school teacher.

"Oh my lady, good morning. Everything was as usual. Some of the children were still struggling with reading and writing, but that was to be expected. It's only been a few weeks since they started school after all."

"I see. Is there anything you need?"

"Nothing urgent, but if it's possible, can I get twenty more writing slates, my lady? I think we miscalculated the number of children in town."

"Alright, I'll have it delivered this evening."

"Thank you my lady."

"What about the adult classes in the evening? Any problem with that?"

"Nothing I can't handle, my lady."

"Very well, if there's any problem with the school, you know where to find me."

"Certainly, my lady."

When I wasn’t visiting the places of importance, I would normally be working in my workshop just a stone's throw away from the school. Since the stuff I kept in the school had to be moved, they were all moved to my workshop. So now my workshop and its surrounding looks more like a junkyard than a workshop, which sucks. I'll be happy when the school building is completed. It will be called Mruna's Naval Academy, a large school facing the Mrun River with plenty of space for recreation and for students from all levels, from primary to secondary to college. The only compulsory level will be primary school, though.

Have I mentioned that I'm also the school's principal? No? Well, I also teach sometimes, but Ms. Collie had an issue with me aiming my gun at naughty children, so she only allowed me to help out occasionally. I admit that was out of line, but they wouldn't listen otherwise! So now my only duty as principal is to acquire supplies for the school and set up the curriculum. Once a week, I teach metallurgy and chemistry but since only the blacksmith's boys and a few boys from Lytis are at that level, my involvement with the lessons is minimal.

After checking out the school, I walked back to the town. There, in the center of town was the newly formed Adventurers’ Guild. Yes, Adventurers’ Guild. Annexed from the house of the former village chief, it was created to provide jobs for those without. Here, I and anyone who needs things done can post jobs for those looking for one.

You see, after I came back from Lytis with a bunch of people, we had a terrible problem with unemployment. There were too many people and too few jobs. I tried my best to give some of them jobs at my place, but the only things that actually needed workers were the farm and the tin mine. That still left me with almost 200 people with no jobs and no homes. Ever since I cut down all the trees behind the port, father had been very protective of the rest of the trees, so it wasn't like I could tell the jobless people to cut down the trees to make more farms. If I left the situation the way it was, soon I'd see a spike in crime and the rise of slums. I didn't want that to happen, so the Adventurers’ Guild was the answer I came up with.

Most commonly, the local residents would be looking for help in the fields. They would pay the Adventurers’ Guild the wages plus service charge specified and then given a token of payment. Anyone looking for work can request the job, and if the guild feels they're suitable for the job, they would be given a job token. Once the task is completed, the employer would hand the worker their payment token and the worker would return to the Adventurers’ Guild to claim their payments. Sometimes the employers would give exceptional workers some gifts like a basket of harvest or some tips. That is fine with us, the Adventurers’ Guild neither approves or reproves such acts.

Eventually, the employers will end up with a favourite worker and will employ them outside of the Adventurers’ Guild's services. That's fine with me. The reason I created the Adventurers’ Guild was to provide jobs for those who couldn't find them in the first place.

"Good morning, Gonne," I greeted as I poked my head through the main doorway.

Gonne was talking to a disgruntled-looking man who was arguing about something. At my greeting, the man took off his hat and they bowed at the same time. I noticed the man was one of the men we brought home from Lytis. So likely he was looking for work.

"Good morning, my lady," Gonne greeted back, "If you will give me a few minutes, my lady, I'll serve you shortly."

"No problem, take your time." I could tell that Gonne was in some kind of trouble, but I decided to let him handle it himself. As assistant guildmaster, I wanted him to learn how to handle things by himself. I couldn’t be around to handle problems every time.

I looked up at the five foot long and three foot tall notice board, noticing that the Adventurers’ Guild idea was a huge success. While most of the job postings were for farming or construction, some others were for acquiring items, such as deer hide or herbs. Due to the multipurpose nature of the Adventurers’ Guild, there were so many job postings that the whole notice board was full of job offers pinned with thumbtacks. Some job postings were even posted on top of existing job postings. I should deliver a new notice board next week.

Before you ask, yes, I ‘invented’ thumbtacks as well. Otherwise we’d have a bunch of nails on the board that could turn the notice board into a murder weapon. I’d rather not have ‘killed with a notice board’ as one of the causes of death in Mruna.

I took an empty form for job posting and filled it in, specifying that I was looking for another carpenter. Ever since father had forbidden me from cutting trees indiscriminately, we had been having a serious issue with lacking timber. I had my ships import timber from places as far as Rotenheim, but we still have a shortage of it. So I've been careful with hiring too many carpenters for fear of running out of timber. It still didn't solve the problem of lacking wood, though.

I guess I'll just import more timber from Renus, while giving grandpa better terms. Hopefully grandpa will agree to sell more timber. He's been making a lot of fuss about timber ever since I told him I didn't have the resources to build a Lollipop Class ship for him. He offered to give me the timber for free if I would build the ship for him for free. I told him, "Hell no!" Even with the free timber there were still many other things that needed to be spent on, such as wages, steel and the five ballistae he expected me to include as part of the deal.

Seemingly done with the other man, Gonne greeted me. "Good day, my lady. I'm sorry that I can't have our daily meeting today, since I have to go out to settle a dispute. My sister Monne is in the office though, if you'd be fine with that."

"It's fine, go ahead. I'll speak with Monne," I said as I made a dismissive wave before putting up the newly filled form onto the notice board.

Monne is Gonne's older sister and Somme's younger sister. Both Somme and Gonne taught her reading and writing themselves in order to improve their own skills. She is an efficient clerk and handles the guild's accounts fairly well. The only reason why I didn't appoint her as first assistant was because she was very shy and timid. If she becomes first assistant, all these burly, muscly men looking for work will just pressure her into accepting their demands. Unlike Serin, who is equally shy but has no problem spilling blood, Monne has no stomach for violence or blood.

Unlike Gonne, whose job is more front desk, Monne's job is more in the guild archives. Here in Mruna, only registered 'adventurers' may take up jobs. There is a one-time four big copper fee for registration and issuing of a 'guild card', but this can be paid through pay deductions over 4-5 jobs if the applicant can't pay it for whatever reason. These guild cards function as identification cards, where we record the jobs they've taken, the amount they've been paid as well as any commendations or comments by their employers. They will then be assigned a Competency Rank and a Trustworthiness rank.

Being 'competent' doesn't mean they can kill dragons (let's say they exist). It simply means they're competent in what they do, for example, farming, fighting, administration or the like. Trustworthiness is determined by how many jobs they've completed versus the jobs they've abandoned and their general attitude towards work and their employers. The ranks range from Unranked U for newbies to A for very accomplished ones. F rank would be given for those who consistently failed every job.

From Monne, I found out that the Adventurers’ Guild was too successful and we've been having more jobs than workers and that unless we have more workers, the requests will just keep stacking up. She also informed me that some of the workers have been getting more rowdy lately and this might cause a problem in the future. I told her I would think of something. I wonder if I may have to lower the age restriction or bring in more peasants from elsewhere. Currently, only children older than 12 could be hired through the Adventurers’ Guild, though there was nothing stopping anyone from hiring kids younger than 12 on their own.

I walked out of the Adventurers’ Guild when I heard the sound of wooden bells tolling in the distance. From the street to my right, a tall banner with the 'Rod of Asclepius' symbol was raised high as the team of spear sentries marched quickly with their baggage, a wounded man lying on a stretcher. This was a team of spear sentries, fulfilling their duty as paramedics in times of need while still maintaining their duties as Mruna's police force.

With the increase in population, there was also a rise in crime. Therefore, I had Merisa arrange for regular patrols, with watch posts in several key spots around the town in addition to previously built guard towers all over the barony. While they still patrolled in full gear, they had switched from war armaments to urban police armaments, retaining everything except the long spear and supply packs. What they carried now were six-foot long staffs in place of long spears and linen cloths along with first aid kits. Apart from being policemen, they also functioned as paramedics. The long staffs and linen cloths could be turned into stretchers easily where the injured could be transferred to the local medical center.

Unlike my previous world's medical centers, the medical centers in this world use herbs instead of drugs. This is something that I can't show any superior knowledge in. Although there are many plants that are similar to my previous world, most plants are really foreign, likely due to different evolutionary paths. For example, we have a rubber bush here, just like in my previous world, but this world's rubber bush is like a thin, tiny rubber tree that grows fast and to extract the rubber, you have to uproot the whole tree, debark it and smash the inside with a hammer. The resulting slurry is the rubber or latex with plant fibre mixed in. Same case with medicinal herbs here, they are somewhat different from what I had back in my previous world. That's why having Serin and Lili learn about it was essential. Although we've had village medicus for generations, the medical center itself was only built last winter following the arrival of all the medici that came with our return from Lytis.

Surprisingly, they knew of the benefits of alcohol and had been using base mrugs as disinfectant as soon as they found out about their high alcohol content. So I had to prepare mrugs not just for regular consumption but also for medical use. Due to this, there are simply not enough mrugs for exports and the only exports I had of mrugs were to Daddy Malor and Daddy Soom in Lytis. I had to keep some of the mrugs in reserve after all, since they were also used in warfare as mrug projectiles. Abundance of Lolipops alone consumed at least four barrels a week even without taking part in any battles.

Have I mentioned that Daddy Malor and Daddy Soom were so impressed by The Abundance of Lollipops that they bought the next best thing, the cogs? Not just one, but three cogs and they loved them. They wanted to buy more but I told them the rest were already reserved. They've been pestering me to build more though, and both were willing to pay top price for either The Abundance of Lollipops or a ship of similar make. So for awhile there, I was swimming in gold. The only problem with building more ships was that, I didn't have enough timber!

I'm not joking when I said I was swimming in gold. I did swim in gold, literally. It happened in the vault under the recently built and heavily fortified Mruna Grains Exchange. No, it has nothing to do with trading stocks. It's a very basic grains exchange. People sell the grains they have in excess and buy grains they want at a fixed price. Sure, they can just barter with their neighbours, but at the Grain Exchange, they can sell it for coins without haggling especially if what they have are so common that nobody wants to barter for it. It's the first step towards having a money-driven economy and toward becoming a city. It also functions as the center of the town’s commercial area.

“The town is growing well,” I commented.

“Indeed, my lady. There are a lot more people now and buildings are getting taller,” Lili agreed.

“It’s still too small to become a city, though.”

“It’s only a matter of time, my lady.”

“I suppose you’re right. Let’s go to the grand opening of the new public bathhouse, Lili.”

“Eh? Isn’t it still too early, my lady?”

“It’s fine to take a bath before the grand opening, right? Besides, I can’t attend the grand opening being this dirty.”

“I’ll send a message to Sul and ask her to send a change of clothes, my lady.”

“Very good. Now let’s go take a bath!”

We arrived at the bathhouse around ten minutes later. It was a large two-storey building with a single tall chimney in the back, though only the ground floor was used for bathing. It was large enough to comfortably accommodate 300 people at the same time. The bathhouse was built about four blocks away from the town center, halfway between the Adventurers’ Guild and my family’s mansion. Designed with nature in mind, it had two locker areas for keeping personal belongings, a large wash room where a reservoir supplied water to the pipes and an even larger soaking area. There were hot water-filled pools made of smooth, circular large rocks with flowering bushes planted in pots near the hot water pools. It must be said that the soaking area had no roof, because I wanted to see the stars while I soaked at night. Since this wasn’t a residential area, there was no fear of people peeking from the apartments. Despite that, I still had a tall brick wall built around the soaking area to deter prying eyes.

There was no separate bath. Both men and women use the same bath. I couldn’t afford to build separate baths on top of everything I had planned to build. So men and women simply had to bathe at separate times. I’d leave that to the bath manager, a job which my normally lazy mother had volunteered to take up. She couldn’t be here for the opening ceremony, though. For some reason, she had to go see grandpa in Renus.

“Good afternoon, Ella,” I greeted the receptionist in charge of the noon shift. She was sweeping the floor in preparation for the opening ceremony.

She curtsied with one hand on the broom. “Good afternoon, my lady. The opening ceremony won’t start for two more hours, but please have a rest in the lounge upstairs in the meantime. Captain Merisa is there too.”

“No, I’m here for a bath. Is the bath ready for use, Ella?”

“Melle just checked it half an hour ago, my lady. It’s ready if you want to use it.”

“Great! Come on, Lili, let’s take a bath. You too, Ella.”

“Eh? But I’m still working-“

“You’ve been sweeping since yesterday. It won’t accumulate that much dust in just one day. Come on, take a break and let’s take a bath together. Call Melle and Merisa too.”

“Yes my lady.”

I tried my best not to grin. My urging for them to bathe together with me had nothing to do with taking a break. I actually just wanted to see them naked. Apart from Merisa, both Ella and Melle were beautiful and well-stacked. Merisa was pretty too, but she was more cool than beautiful and although she had a respectable pair, she wasn’t stacked like the other two.

Guess I still like women after all.

Oh, not good, I’m letting out a drool.

Together with Lili, I walked into the locker room as Ella went upstairs to call for Merisa and Melle to join us. While taking off my own dress, I eyed Lili’s lean body. Unlike me, Lili had already started having a nice beginning of a pair of hills on her chest. With her tight, slim body, growing breasts and butt and pretty face, she was starting to look like a junior idol from my previous world.

Don’t misunderstand. Although we have similar faces and bodies, I wasn’t trying to praise myself through praising her. I just sincerely like her. As a friend, of course.

“Please don’t stare too much, my lady,” Lili said while attempting to hide her breasts and crotch with the linen towel that was provided free by the bathhouse inside the locker.

“Eh? Was I staring?” I asked, though I already knew that I was indeed staring.

“Mm,” Lili mumbled as she looked sideways.

“Sorry, let’s go have a wash, okay?” I said as I took her hand and lead her to the wash area.

We washed each other tenderly in the wash area, with the fragrant soap made from several kinds of flower oils. She looked embarrassed as I washed her and it looked like she tried to avoid moaning, judging from the way she bit her lips while making small sounds in her throat. Then she washed me in exchange and it felt so good that I wanted to lie on the wooden bench by the corner while she rubbed my back until I fell asleep.

My eyes were drawn to the wooden sliding door as it opened, revealing the three beauties in their naked splendour. Unlike the other two, Merisa who led them into the wash room apparently had no idea that the towel was supposed to hide her private parts. Thus she placed it on her shoulder the way a man would have done in my previous life and confidently walked bare-naked into the washroom, proudly revealing every part of her body for my eyes to capture in all its splendour.

“My lady, you’re drooling,” Lili said as she wiped my drool with her own towel.

Boobs, butts, blushing faces. Uhehehehe. Yes! This is what being a man should be like. Mature women are the best after all.

Except I’m a girl now, damn it! What am I going to do with this sexual frustration?

******

“What are you doing? Catch it properly!” I yelled as Merisa was kicked away into one of the hot water pools.

“You pervert horse, taste my poison needles!” Lili cried as she threw three steel darts at the rampaging horse.

“Eeyaa!!!” Ella screamed when one of steel darts barely missed her naked breasts.

“Don’t let the dumb horse loose!” I commanded while running back to the locker room. I was going to grab my gun and shoot the dumb horse in the eye.

You’re wondering what’s happening?

It happened after washing our bodies, you see. We entered the soaking area together afterwards, but instead of relaxing in the hot pools, we saw the same white horse that made me dirty this morning soaking inside one of the tubs. Of course, I told everyone to catch the dumb horse. Nobody bathes in my hot water bathhouse before me!

And so after grabbing my gun, and running back to the soaking area still stark naked, I fired a shot. “BANG!” It missed the horse but managed to make it freeze on the spot. Merisa and Melle then took the opportunity to bring it down by tying its legs with their towels, causing the horse to fall to its side when it struggled.

“Huff, huff. Got you now, you dumb horse. Have anything to say before I put a bullet in your eye?”

The horse neighed.

“Ha? You were just bathing? How dare a dirty perverted horse bathe with me in my hot water pool. Go find yourself a river if you want to bathe so much.”

It neighed again.

“You’re not a pervert because you’re a mare? Merisa, check it.”

“Eh?”

“Check if it’s really a mare, Merisa.”

Looking confused, it took Merisa only seconds to understand the order, as expected of the captain of the spear sentries. She cautiously touched the horse’s privates while watching its legs. The horse neighed as its privates were felt up.

“Shut up and take it quietly, you damned horse. Do you really want a bullet in your brain?”

“She’s a mare, my lady,” Merisa confirmed

“I see, so you’re not a perverted stallion after all.”

The horse nodded enthusiastically.

“But that doesn’t make it okay to bathe in a human bath,” I said as I pointed my gun at its head.

The horse neighed a sad tone.

“No matter how much you plead, I won’t be swayed, you know. I won’t have my hot pool be dirtied with mud. In the first place, it’s only for soaking. You were supposed to wash yourself first instead of jumping straight in!”

It neighed an even sadder tone.

“Ha? If I let you live, you’ll be my loyal servant? What nonsense! How do you expect me to trust you after you almost killed me this morning?”

Neighed.

“Ah geez! Stop crying! Fine, I’ll spare your life this time, but if you try to rebel or harm me again, I’ll definitely cut off your legs and roast them in front of your own eyes.”

Neighed.

“Merisa, please untie her legs. As for you, go wait at home. I’ll take you to the river later. On second thought, just go yourself. Ask the other horses if you don’t know the way. How the heck did you get in anyway?”

The horse pointed its head in one direction.

“You broke the back door? You stupid horse! That door was meticulously carved by an artisan! I’m going to work you hard to pay back that door. Now go away before I change my mind and put you out of your misery.”

Peace finally returned after the horse left through the still wide-open back door. I’ll have to ask Melle and Ella to have a temporary door fitted until I can find a replacement. Or maybe I’ll just ask mother to take care of it. Yup, that’s a better idea.

“Say, what does everyone think about a flower festival?” I asked the group as we sat down in one of the hot pools.

“What is a flower festival, my lady?” Melle asked while rubbing hot water into her shoulders.

“Basically, it’s a day off to admire beautiful flowers. Not just that, there will also be performances, food stalls and game stalls set up for everyone to relax and enjoy the food and the atmosphere.”

“Umm... I can’t understand why any would want to admire beautiful flowers, my lady. I do like the idea of food stalls, but I’d have to know the details before I can set up a security detail.”

“What are you saying, Merisa? If you have a girl’s heart, won’t you want to look at pretty things? Beautiful flowers are pretty things.”

“I’m sorry for not having a girl’s heart,” Merisa said while looking down.

“You said game stalls, my lady? What kind of games?” Ella asked as she raised her left hand.

“Many types, for example, fish scooping, mini bow archery, ball throwing and so many more things! Of course, there will be prizes to be won.”

“Oh, that sounds nice. We have Aging Festivals, but there were never any games like that.”

“That’s why this is going to be a first!” I said proudly.

“I’m in, what can I help you with, my lady?” Melle said.

“Me too!” Ella said excitedly.

“If you wish for it, I’ll do anything you wish for, my lady,” Merisa agreed.

“Alright! Everyone agrees. I’ll have to do some planning, then I’ll have to talk to father about it. Expect one by the end of Spring, everyone!”

Of course, I didn’t need to ask Lili. She already agreed to help me as much as possible when I talked about it with her earlier. I love Lili so much! Of course, only as a friend.

When we got up and went back to the locker room to dress up for the opening ceremony later, Lili whispered to me, “My lady, were you talking to the horse earlier?”

I looked at her while making a frown. “What are you talking about, Lili?”

******

Knock knock.

“Open the door, Sul,” I said without taking my eyes off the leather-bound book in my hand. I was sitting alone at the dining table after dinner as Lili was with her mother Suin to learn more about various herbs and poisons.

“Yes, big sister Felli,” the cursed object smiled cutely.

It must’ve been my imagination, because I saw her fake cat ears and tail twitched.

“My lady,” a man in a trench coat stepped inside and took off his hat before pressing it against his chest. It was the messenger I sent to father who was in Renus visiting grandpa with mother.

“So you have returned? What did the baron say?” I asked while flipping the page of the book.

"YOU IDIOT!”

BANG! I put a bullet hole in the wooden door behind him, just an inch away from his left ear. “You asshole, who do you think you're saying that to, huh?” I said as I put the book down and walked towards the man with the smoky gun in my right hand.

“No, that was the message, my lady! It was what the baron said!”

“Really?” I asked as I pushed the second barrel of the gun against the throat of the taller man.

“Yes, that was all he said, my lady! I swear!”

I took off the gun from his neck and whispered to myself, “Damn it, father! We need a flower festival!”

Previous Chapter | Next Chapter

Read more »

Yay! Felicia's On Amazon!

 Felicia's Second Life now on Sale!

As the title says:

Yay! Felicia's Second Life is on Amazon!

Finally!

Darn, I thought publishing an ebook is easy. I have absolutely no idea it would take me over a month. I feel like crying. I'll cry further if it turns out my book is so uninteresting that nobody outside would buy it. Well, here's hoping that FSL will become a success.

Thanks a lot to everyone who read, commented and supported me so far.

Anyway, apart from Amazon, I also put it up on other sites as well. Strangely Inktera put up my book earlier than Amazon, despite me using an aggregator for Inktera. I guess it's true the people at Draft2digital are hardworking. They're also the only aggregator service that actually replied my mail. Now if only they're not based in the US and if only they have wider reach.

For those who are interested in buying the book, you can search for "felicia's second life". I'm using the Shiina Ai pseudonym.

Or you can click here, which takes you straight there.


Felicia's Second Life Volume 1: I don't want to be violent, yet it's the only way


If you do wish to buy it, would you be so kind as to leave a comment as well? Thank you very much. I'll release the next chapter of FSL once I'm done all the promotional stuff for FSL and finished a job I've been putting up that's nearing the due date. I hope that client isn't mad for having to wait long.

If you wish to buy it but for some reason can't buy it through Amazon, please inform me so that I can find a way.  As mentioned, I already have it up on Inktera and will be up on Kobo, eSentral and some other places later. I'll put additional links on FSL main page later. I don't want to spam your feeds with ten "Yay! Felicia's on..." posts everytime it's up somewhere. Or if you have a preference, simply mail me and I'll inform you once it's up on your preferred sites.

Again, thanks everyone who supported me so far. Please keep supporting me in the future.

Read more »

Felicia's Second Life Epilogue: The Souvenir From Lytis

The Souvenir From Lytis

Hello! I am Latreia Tullenaris Melstad, baroness of Mruna and second daughter of the duke of Renus. Most people call me Baroness Latreia, but you're all my daughter's friends, so just call me Rhea. My father, my husband and my siblings call me Rhea too. My children call me mother. Usually my daughter makes the introduction, but it's finally my moment to shine.

Yay me!

You know, I originally wanted to receive them at the port. I did try going to the port. Walked almost two hundred feet too, before I gave up and asked Suin to carry me home. Walking is too tiring! So now I'm just waiting for them to come home.

Quickly get home! I want to go to sleep already!

******

"We're hoooome!" my husband and son announced as they opened the front door.

"Welcome hoooome!" I cried as I hugged first my husband and then my son.

I looked around. "Where's my daughter?"

"She'll be home shortly," my husband said as he took a seat at the dining table.

"How can anyone be so popular?" Yox mumbled.

"Why? What happened?"

"She was mobbed and carried away the moment we stepped down from the ship. I can't believe my daughter is more popular than me, the baron. I'm feeling very neglected," my husband whined with his left cheek on the dining table. He looked very depressed.

"Fufufu, that's my daughter, alright!"

"Unn, at least we're a naval power now,” my husband said without raising his head from the table.

"Naval power? What do you mean, dear?"

"We seized three triremes. Alongside Felicia's big ship, we have a stronger navy than even grandfather now!" my son Yox explained excitedly.

"Oh my, but our navy is already stronger than father's fleet. Fufufu. Let me guess, you haven't seen the other ships yet, Yox?"

"What other ships?" my son looked at me with disbelief. (O.O)

Fufufu, that’s what you get for never coming home since the day you left for the knight’s academy. "Oh my! Dear, I know you're tired from the journey, but would you show him Felicia's new ships tomorrow?"

"Sure. Tomorrow sounds good."

"I'm hooome! Mother, I'm hungry."

"Oh my, oh my. You're a girl, Felicia. Try to show some restraint," I said as I opened my arms wide, allowing my daughter jumped into my arms.

"I want food! Food! I've spent weeks eating canned food on a swaying ship. I want real food, mother!" my daughter declared as she swung her arms in a childish gesture that reminded me of her real age despite how mature she was most of the time.

"Oh my, you're such a spoiled girl, Felicia." I patted my little girl's head. She purred in happiness.

It was while patting and rubbing Felicia’s head that I noticed there was another head behind her. No, I don’t mean Lili, she’s always around Felicia these days. With how similar their faces look like, though, they’re starting to look more like twins than real twins.

"Who's that?" I asked while pointing at the extra head behind her.

My daughter's face paled as she asked, "Wh-who's who, mother?"

"The girl behind you."

My daughter's face paled as she slowly turned around. The moment she saw the girl, she exclaimed, "Arhk! The pest!"

"Teeheehee, I followed you home, big sister Feli,” the little girl giggled sheepishly. The little girl looked surprisingly adorable. Even more adorable than Felicia when she was the same age. Oh, where have the years gone?

"Are you a stray dog?!" Felicia scolded.

"Souvenir?" I asked.

"Mother, you can clearly see this is a human."

"Sul needs a home... nyan!" the little girl mewled while placing her right fist on the side of her head in a gesture that looked like a lucky beckoning cat.

So cute!

“Hey! Are you a dog or a cat? Make up your mind, you pest!”

"I've decided!"

My daughter's face made a mask of apprehension as she said, "No, mother, please don't decide anything. I'll kick the stray dog outside. I'll put her into a crate and ship her back to Lytis. We can pretend like this never happened. Just please, don't make any decision!"

"We're going to keep her!" Yup, I've decided.

"Yay!" My souvenir cheered.

"Noooo!!! Father, say something!"

"I'm hungry too."

"Not that! Father, please grab mother. I'll pry the pest away from her!"

"No! It's my souvenir!"

"Mother, that's not a souvenir. That's a cursed object! Let me throw it away!"

"You're exaggerating."

"I'm not! She's going to haunt me until my death! Throw it out, mother!"

"Don't wanna!"

"Mother!"

"No!"

"Can't we just go straight to lunch? I'm really hungry," my husband intervened.

"Father, help me!"

"It's just a little girl, Felicia."

"That's not a little girl, father! It's an evil spirit. A cursed object!"

"That's a very mean thing to say, Felicia."

"She followed me all the way from Lytis!"

"Is there anything to eat, Rhea?"

"Don't ignore me, father!"

"You're in luck! I've just baked a cake. Let's eat together while Suin prepares some lunch," I said while hugging the souvenir.

"A cake?!" my husband paled.

"A cake?!" my children asked in disbelief.

"That's right! Come on, eat up! I made this when I heard you were coming home. You too, Lili. I've made enough for everyone."

Lili expressed her gratitude when I gave her a portion of the cake on a silver plate.

"Woah! First day of being home and I get to eat mother's cake! I've never eaten anything you baked in my whole life, mother!" my son exclaimed as he looked at the cake I placed in front of him.

"There is a reason for that..." my husband commented.

"Ah, my lord, you shouldn't..." Suin came out looking worried.

"Wow, mother, I didn't know you can bake! This looks good!" my daughter praised.

"Ah, er, it's okay, I will finish it for everyone. Don't worry, you don't have to eat it."

"What are you talking about, father? How can you selfishly eat it all on your own?" my son argued.

"Yeah! I'm eating it, I've never eaten anything mother baked before!"

It’s been so long since my son Yox and my daughter Felicia ever agreed on anything. I’m so happy. My children are finally being nice to each other again.

"There's really a good reason for that... Oh damn it, you'll understand."

Everyone took a bite at the same time.

Everyone shed tears at the same time. (TT-TT)

Oh my, oh my. Are you all so happy that you're in tears? I feel so appreciated!

"Salty..." the souvenir said with a river of tears flowing down her cute face.

Eh? Is there a problem?

Previous Chapter | Next Chapter

Read more »

Felicia's Second Life Chapter 8 Part 3

A Naval Stomping Part 3

"This should be all. Are you sure this is enough, princess?" Kanto asked as he ticked off the last of the barrels containing food and fresh water for our voyage home. I was quite surprised when he showed that he could actually read and write. Most people in this region who were neither nobles nor merchants often couldn't read even if their lives depended on it.

"It's probably not enough, but if we bring too much food, there'll be less living space. Let's just hope the amount we presently carry is enough. If not, we'll just stop by Wamor or Hollehafen on our way home," I said while watching Mr. Lars, my second mate, conduct interviews of every man and woman who came on board.

Apparently the longboat couldn't carry all the supplies to the ship, so he had to buy three rowboats to help carry it with the leftover money I gave him. They still needed two trips to carry it all but it was good that the loading of supplies proceeded smoothly. I wondered if some of the less desirable people could be persuaded to sleep in the boats on our way home.

So far, we had carpenters, cooks, masons, glassblowers, a medicus, a school teacher, a mime (yes, seriously, a mime!), bards, fishermen, construction workers and what appeared to be a glee club. They had been singing non-stop from the moment they came on board. Such noise! What could make them so happy as to keep on singing for that long?

There were also thieves, thugs and cutthroats as well. That Surfesian bastard really cleaned house this time and dumped it all on me. And I actually fell for this trick! How stupid.

There were still about 150 people left, and I already feared a mutiny. To avoid any unnecessary incidents, I had the spear sentries, the women and children relocated to decks 2 and 3. Those from Mruna and Renus slept on decks 3 and 4 while the rest slept on deck 5. It was cramped, like a can of sardines. There must have been more than 500 people on board now.

"Hey, Fel!" a slightly deep voice of a barely adult man called from somewhere in the crowd.

"Yes, big brother Yucks, what do you want?" I asked while leaning against the starboard railing. If only I could throw all these people into the Mrun River.

"Why do you keep mispronouncing my name?" my big brother asked.

"Why do you keep shortening my name?" I asked back.

"Fel is easier to pronounce. What's your excuse?"

"Yucks is more amusing to say aloud."

He made a grimace as if holding in his shit. But instead of taking a dump, he said, "Father and I have been wondering, where do we sleep? It seems like all the private quarters were taken by the other nobles."

"Talk to Gani, ask him for two extra hammocks. You and father will sleep in my cabin."

"Where do I find Gani? How does he look like again?"

"Third deck. He's the quartermaster. He's 10 years old."

"A quartermaster at 10 years old? How weird!"

"Or you can sleep with the fishes. Your choice."

"I didn't say I wouldn’t see him!" he grumbled as he took the rear staircase towards the lower decks.

Without caring whether he actually managed to find Gani or not, I opened the door to my cabin and entered wordlessly. In front of me was the crown prince, sleeping soundly in a hammock tied to the ceiling. At his side was Lili, who were feeding him some kind of liquid through a straw.

"How is he, Lili?"

"Sleeping like a baby, my lady. As long as I keep feeding him the Sleep Draught every five hours, he won't be waking up at all."

"Very good. Are you coming to bed, Lili?"

"B-bed? Can I, my lady?"

"We've slept together for a week, it will feel weird sleeping by myself when we're so close to each other, Lili," I said as I laid down on the bed.

"Th-then, if you're okay with me, my lady, but-"

"Come, Lili," I called her with my hand as I laid on my side.

"Yes, my lady!" Lili gushed in happiness as she laid herself beside me.

We slept snuggled to each other, just like before that pest Sul appeared.

******

I woke up hugging something soft and small. Somehow, Lili felt very fluffy. The size was also a little smaller than usual. And what's with this flat chest...

WHAT THE HELL?!!!

I woke up abruptly. My eyes opened wide as I looked at the thing I was holding.

It was the pest! Why was she here? How could she be here? What? How? Why?

"Uhn? Oh good morning, big sister Feli," she said groggily.

I grabbed her by the collar, opened the cabin's window and threw her out into the Mrun River. That was not Sul. That was an evil spirit. Yup, an evil spirit. Not even a human, or an animal. Just an evil spirit. Oh, if anyone asks, let's just say I was hallucinating. Yup, that's good.

While I was heaving a sigh of relief from my delusions, the door opened and what appeared there was... "That was a good bath. I feel so refreshed now. Thanks for the wake up bath, big sister Feli."

In front of me, standing at the open doorway, was the evil spirit. She was soaked from head to toe. Her plain white dress that had been dry was now wet, dripping dark water on the wooden floor. In the darkness of the cabin, she looked like an avenging spirit from the bottom of the sea.

"Gyaaaaa!!!!" I screamed in terror.

"My lady?" Lili appeared behind the evil spirit.

"Lili, I'm haunted. I'm haunted!"

"Eh? Haunted? What do you - wait, we have a bigger problem right now actually, my lady!" Lili said as she handed the evil spirit a towel from the closet and dragged me outside.

I stood on the aftcastle and before me were a lot of triremes. After we arrived near the port, most of the triremes that escorted us went away, leaving only six patrolling triremes passing by us from time to time. Right now though, I could see that we were surrounded by 13 triremes.

Did they found out I poisoned their prince?

"Anyone can tell me how long they've been here?"

"Since dawn, captain," Mr. Lustri answered, "They're not doing anything, just... watching... it seems."

"Have they said anything yet?"

"None, I tried to ask them to make way through flag signal, but they wouldn't even answer."

"Strange... I wonder if they're picking a fight. Wake all able-bodied men. Arm them with something, but keep them out of sight."

"Aye, captain," Mr Lustri said as he left for the lower decks.

While waiting for any sign of change from the trireme fleet surrounding us, I laid out a plan in case they were going to fight. I looked at the survey that Mr. Lars did last night and from there, I assigned 40 men to each to Mr. Lustri and Captain Kento and they were going to take a longboat each to protect the brig. I left the strategies to them, but they would generally rely on quick hit and run tactics, which would include bowmen firing arrows at officers (Mr. Lustri) as well as quick boarding and demolition (Captain Kento). For that matter, I had them discreetly move weapons into their longboats in crates and barrels, masking it as usual loading of cargo. I also placed some lollipop explosives near the ballistas.

I also asked the knights to give a crash course on weapons handling on the deck below to the men. As for the women, I had the spear sentries handle their crash course training, but with so many men, it would be unlikely for them to have to fight except to keep the enemy from entering the hold. For those who couldn't fight, such as those without an arm or a leg, I had them learn how to row the forty sweeps of the brig. All we had to do then, was wait.

We didn't have to wait long. Four hours after dawn, a newly arrived trireme sailed very close towards us. I had Captain Konto move his longboat to the other side of the ship, to avoid those in that trireme from seeing the inside of the longboat. When that trireme stopped about twenty feet away from my ship, a man walked up to the bow. From the demeanor and the flashy leather armour, I imagined he was someone fairly high ranked.

"Greetings to Forlendian ship. I am Duke Rafjar The Victorious. Who commands your ship?" the man in flashy armour introduced himself.

"Good morning, I am Captain Felicia Belphere Metrune. Am I right in assuming that it is by your order that these ships are blocking our way home?"

"Indeed, it was I who gave that order."

"May I ask why?"

"You sailed a warship into our waters. You, Forlendians. It can only be construed as an act of intimidation, if not an act of war."

"An act of intimidation?! How many times do I have to keep waving the letter from the Duke of Renus? We are here to ransom our people from Prince Hans! Due to the large number of hostages we needed a large ship. Go ask Prince Hans how many people we ransomed!"

Oh wait, he's probably still asleep. I dumped a lot of the Tincture of Truth into the bottle of wine.

"Or just ask his knight Carlton!" I added.

"I do not know nor do I care about your arrangements with the prince. As far as I know, you are a threat to Surfes and Lytis, and therefore I must ask you to surrender your ship and prepare to be boarded."

"The prince didn't send you?"

"No. I do not take orders from the prince."

Phew! I thought we were blockaded because they found out I poisoned the prince.

"So surrender and I shall let you live and return to your homeland."

I see. So this is a ruse to steal my ship? Don't make me laugh.

"If you take my ship, how will we return home? There are around 500 people on board now. Most of them are women and small children!"

"You may hire merchants to bring your people home. We will provide you escort into Forlendian waters. I promise you safe passage all the way to Wamor."

So not only you want me to give you my ship, you want me to pay merchants to transport us home? How obnoxious can you be?

"Would you allow me to discuss this with the nobles, duke? They may not like to leave their comfortable quarters."

"You have an hour," the duke said as he walked down the bow of his trireme.

"Captain, are we really giving up the ship?" Mr. Lustri asked once we were inside my cabin.

"Are you kidding me? Give these apes my ship? Do I look like some kind of pushover?"

Gani added an obvious fact. "We're facing 14 triremes, and who knows how many more on the way."

"Hum, that's the problem. Even if each of the lollipops can sink one ship, which would be too much to hope for, we'd still be facing 3 more triremes. That is if we're lucky that they can't bring reinforcements quick enough. With enough momentum, they can ram us and sink us."

"Then what should we do, captain?"

"Gani, how much base mrug do we still have?"

"We still have 18 barrels of base mrug, my lady. As you recall, we sold 6 barrels to your merchant friends."

"Gather everyone's mugs as well as their lids. If any mug doesn't have a lid, have the carpenter make one. I want at least 100 watertight mugs in half an hour. As soon as possible, have the spear sentries, the women and the unskilled children fill each of them with pure mrug and close it tightly. They are NOT to drink it."

"Are we having a party, my lady?" Gani asked.

"Do it. Now."

"Yes, my lady."

"Keizo-"

"Keito."

"Whatever, get your men ready. You and Mr. Lustri are going to do as we originally planned. Your duties will be to ensure that enemy triremes don't get close. If you need anything, load it now, but make it look like you're evacuating. You can use any method you can think of to stop them. If you have to sacrifice the longboats, do it. Make sure that the triremes can't ram the ship. This ship is now our castle, it must not fall!"

"So we're fighting, captain?" Mr. Lars asked.

"Absolutely. Also, have someone carry six barrels of mrug and place one of them at the bow near the ballista. Do the same with the rear ballista. But not too close, you hear?"

"Ahhh, ok?" Mr. Lars nodded.

"While you're at it, Mr Lars, deploy all four of our rowboats. Fill them with flammable stuff like straw, paper or wood chips and tie the other four barrels of mrug to the front of the rowboats."

I'm so glad that Keizo bought us additional boats last night.

"Captain, are we going to fight or give them a bribe?"

"Oh, we're going to have a festival. Huhuhuhuhu."

An hour later, Duke Rafjar The Victorious (lol) came up to the bow of his trireme.

"It's time, little girl, what's your decision?"

"Nyeh!" I taunted with my tongue out.

"Impudent brat! Archers, fire!"

"Shields!" I ordered as the spear sentries stacked up wooden square shields that completely protected one side of the deck from arrows in two levels.

This shield was different from a spear sentry standard issue shield. For one, it was completely square, flat and featureless. It was basically a series of planks nailed together by two wooden bars. When used, it could be stacked atop another in two levels, causing anyone behind it to be fully protected. It created a shaded area eight feet tall that was completely safe from arrows. We couldn't use these back during the night raid by the pirates because we were caught by surprise, but we had plenty of time for this battle.

"Ballistae, fire lollipops! Closest ships first!"

The three ballistae then fired their explosive payloads. As they had already taken some time to aim at their targets, their attacks struck true. Three triremes were sunk within the first two minutes of battle. Meanwhile, I had a surprise of my own.

"Hey duke!" I said as I threw the lollipop in my hand. Its fuse already burning, I said, "Here's a present from the beautiful Lady Felicia! Hahahaha."

Despite seeing three of his triremes sunk, he still couldn't comprehend how it happened. Therefore, he couldn't tell that what I was throwing was actually the cause. As with all unidentified thrown things, the natural decision would definitely be to evade. So he did. Too bad for him, the lollipop fell into the lower decks of his trireme. Can you guess what happened?

BOOM! Even as his leaking trireme was filled with water, he still couldn't understand what actually happened. That idiotic look that was a mixture of shock and incomprehension was classic. It was priceless!

The general is down. I repeat. The general is down. Muhahahahah!

Unfortunately, the lollipops weren't as much of a technological edge I had hoped for. Perhaps it would've performed better had I carried more, but with only 11, there was a limit to how many ships it could sink. As it was, only 5 successfully sunk a trireme each. 4 of them were used to sink two ships when the first ones failed to open a breach on the hull. The rest missed the ships completely. As the enemy triremes started circling the ship to bring their firepower (arrows) to the unshielded side, it was time for Plan B.

"Split shields to starboard. Protect the ballistae. Bring up the mrugs!" I commanded.

"Wait! Captain, you can't be serious!" Mr. Lars said as my young crewmen brought up casks filled with watertight, mrug-filled handle-less mugs towards all three ballistas.

"Drench the mugs!" I said, to which the mugs were drenched in more mrugs. I could hear sounds of pleading from around me.

"Aim, set flames, fire!" I ordered as the ballistae launched their flaming projectiles towards the triremes in range.

There was a resounding "Noooooooo!!!" from the whole ship. I ignored the look of despair among the crewmates around me. Not only that, I also ignored the tears of the ballista crews. We had more important things to think about than their chance of getting drunk.

"Ballistae, fire mrugs at will!" I ordered as fireballs made up of flaming wooden mugs filled with flammable beverage flew in the air three at a time.

"Captain, please, stoooopp!!!" Mr. Lars begged on his knees.

"If you have the time to grovel, I suggest you start launching the fireboats now."

"But they're carrying mrug!"

"Launch it!"

Reluctantly and with tears wetting his face, Mr. Lars gave the order to launch the rowboats filled with straw, wood chips, paper and a whole barrel of mrug towards the approaching enemy triremes. The boats manned by five sailors each then approached the approaching enemy triremes and with tears in their eyes, set fire to the straw and jumped out. As the triremes smashed into the boats at high speed they crushed the barrels of mrug into pieces, causing the mrug inside to spatter against the ships and catch fire. Before they could even reach my ship, the whole front part of the triremes were in flames and their rowing crew simply escaped into the water. It was easy to avoid the burning ships afterward.

We managed to destroy all 14 triremes simply from the sheer act of surprise.

Unfortunately, we couldn't celebrate just yet, as the second wave, a fleet consisting of 12 more triremes, approached fast. I immediately ordered the ballistae to concentrate their fire on one trireme at a time. We managed to set the lead ships on fire, but many others escaped or failed to catch fire.

I noticed that the ones that had a direct hit but failed to catch fire were all spanking new ships. I deduced that the older the ships were, the easier to have it set on fire. It was probably related to the level of wood rot.

"Ballistae, aim towards port-bow, fire at will! Archers, put pressure at starboard. Shields, protect the ballistae!"

Just as I finished giving orders, a trireme that was on a ramming speed towards my ship was hit from the portside by the Stare Vipers. The whole frontal part of the longboat was smashed, but it succeeded in diverting the trireme's path, eventually causing it to miss the ship by a small margin. As their longboat started to sink, they threw grapnel at the trireme they had diverted and boarded it in just a couple of minutes. As expected of pirates.

As battle raged on the trireme that Captain Kento boarded, Mr. Lustri's longboat performed hit and run tactics consisting of archers firing at visible officers as well as a liberal use of flaming mugs of mrug. They basically tied the mugs with linen ropes, set them on fire, then spun the mugs over their heads while holding on to the end of the rope before lobbing it into the triremes. Just by themselves, they managed to set fire to 4 triremes.

Three of the triremes managed to ram the ship, but thanks to its sturdy construction, they couldn't puncture the hull. The large number of wrecks around us likely helped too, as they helped reduce the momentum of the ramming ships. It's like threading the needle around a bunch of wrecks on a highway, you can't go fast. Unfortunately for them, speed and inertia were a trireme's greatest weapon. The wrecks of triremes around the ship actually helped shield us from ramming attacks as the triremes couldn't use their main weapon, the ramming head.

We managed to set fire to one of them by throwing a whole barrel into the trireme from the top deck and throwing a torch into it after it smashed against the deck. One of the triremes that rammed us was abandoned when we peppered them with arrows. Unfortunately, the same wrecks that shielded us from their ramming attacks also slowed our movements, as the debris and wrecks made it impossible to row effectively.

The crew of the other trireme managed to board the ship. Thankfully, we had more soldiers on board now and they managed to hold the boarders on deck. I shot them whenever I could, but the real MVPs of the battle on board the brig were the knights and nobles that we ransomed from that perverted prince. For the first time, I was able to watch father and Yucks's prowess with their swords. Watching Yucks, I realized that it was absolutely inexcusable that he was still an apprentice knight.

All in all, we destroyed 21 triremes and captured 3. The other two triremes fled in fear.

A third wave consisting of 8 more ships from somewhere else also arrived later. When they saw all the burning wrecks around us, they didn't even bother getting close. It was a wise choice. It was also a good development for us, as we ran out of mugs to throw at them. Until we reached port, the crew would have to share their mugs with each other.

We lost all four rowboats, one longboat and around 80 dead or missing. There were many injuries, some severe and that would probably cause them to be crippled for the rest of their lives. Let’s not count the enemy's casualties. Mr. Lustri tried to find and save as many of our crewmen that fell into the water, but he couldn't find many of them.

We did recover Duke Rafjar The Victorious (lol) and two of his men, though. He was wet and his leather armour clung tightly to his body, probably causing him much pain now. I had the sailors kick his knees, making him kneel on the top deck.

"Apologize to my crew for the lives you cost us today," I said.

"I am a duke! I do not apologize!"

I looked down at this prideful duke. "Let's see, if you don't apologize, you'll become a dead duke in about one swing. Do you think you're able to do that, Keizo?"

"It's Keito, princess."

I gave a Keizo a glare.

He coughed. "Not that it matters, princess. Yes, actually I wonder if I can do that. It will probably take me several swings to kill him."

"Hum, I'm sorry it will be a very painful death for you, duke. So why don't you save yourself the trouble and just apologize?"

"I will not apologize."

"Keizo, slash his leg."

"Which one, princess?"

"Pick one."

"Wait! Wait! I-I apologize..." he said quietly.

"Ha? I can't hear anything. Does anyone hear that?"

A resounding 'no' was heard from everyone around me. Some even added encouragements for a death penalty.

"I'm sorry."

"Louder, duke!"

"I'M SORRY!" he cried, his face looking down.

"See? That wasn't so bad. Now kiss my boots."

"What?" he asked back. It seemed like he still had some fight in him.

"Kiss my boots."

"You! How dare you! I'm a duke!"

"Oh? Someone please start cutting up his legs."

"WAIT!" he cried, before he bowed lower on his knees and kissed my boots, one after another.

"Very good, because you kissed my boots like a good dog, I'll let you live today. Now everyone, throw these losers off my ship," I said as I instructed the sailors to get the duke and his two lackeys off my ship.

Mr. Lustri made one final sweep of the waters for our men, but he only managed to recover two more who were shivering from being in the cold water for so long. As the evening sun set, we departed from the waters of Lytis, leaving behind the burning wrecks of enemy triremes and the crewmen that we couldn't recover. Most of the men were moved to the three triremes, led by Mr. Lustri, Captain Keiso and Mr. Lars. Gani, my quartermaster took over as Abundance of Lollipop's second in command.

It was unfortunate that so many died, but for that price, we killed hundreds, perhaps thousands of Surfesian soldiers. As a final service, we as a whole prayed for their eventual reincarnation and offered them some salt and ash to help in their long journey. May the ancestors watch over them.

Before we left though, I told Mr. Lustri to fire an arrow wrapped in a letter that I wrote towards the lead ship of the third wave. His arrow hit the captain of the lead ship, causing him to fall to the deck. It was an act worthy of praise.

"Mr. Lustri, not that I'm complaining, that was a good shot after all. But I thought I told you to hit the main mast?" I asked as I looked at the lead ship with my telescope.

"Aye captain, but it's hard to hit the target at this range and in the middle of the Mrun River."

Just then I saw the captain got up with the help of one of his crewmen. I breathed a sigh of relief that the arrow only hit the captain's arm. One of the crewmen unwrapped the letter around the arrow.

The letter read:

Listen you Surfesian dogs,
 
You have been pwned by The Abundance of Lollipops. Just look around at the pathetic wrecks of your formerly vaunted trireme fleets. Your only option is to let us go our own way. If you dare send any ship in pursuit, I will turn around and burn Lytis to the ground as well as your whole fleet until even the night will become as bright as day from the flames that will lick your city and your ships.
 
You have been warned.
 

 
Captain Felicia Belphere Metrune.
That pretty lady that will make your mothers weep.

I later found out that on this day, my name carried along the title of 'Destroyer of Fleets'. So whenever Surfesian mariners spoke of me, they would call me 'Captain Felicia The Destroyer of Fleets'. Mr. Lustri became a legend as 'He Who Hits An Arm At 2 Miles'. Technically it wasn't even half a mile away, but you know how rumours got exaggerated over time. As for Duke Rafjar The Victorious (lol), his name was changed into Baron Rafjar The Bootkisser by his own men. Yes, his rank was also reduced to a baron by his own king after the great loss Surfesian navy suffered and he retired in shame shortly after.

It's good to have a spy in enemy country. I get to listen to all the funny gossip.

******

"And then mother said "Bring back souvenirs!" And I was like "Mother, we're not in Lytis to sightsee, you know?"”

Father chuckled listening to my stories.

"That sounds like your mother, alright. Always so adorable."

"Unn, childish is more like it though," I mumbled.

There was a knock on the door before it was opened wide and Mr. Lustri's face appeared. "Captain, we've arrived at the port. What are your orders?"

"Take us in slowly. Give the populace time to spread the news of our return. Allow all the soldiers we brought back to stand on the deck. Make sure they're seen."

You're probably wondering why I gave such an order. It's simply a publicity stunt. What raises the morale of a populace of a war-torn land the most? Of course, it’s to see their loved ones return home. Some won’t see their loved ones return and they will cry and feel sad, but that also works in my favour.

"Aye, captain." Mr. Lustri saluted before he went out and closed the door behind him.

"Shall we go out as well, father?"

"Of course, being kept inside a dungeon made me think of home far too much," father said as he offered me his arm.

I hooked arms with father, walking side by side to the door... until we realized that the door was a little too small for both of us to walk side by side.

"After you," father said as he disengaged our arms.

I probably should have this door enlarged.

"Strange, I feel like we're missing something," father said when both he and Yucks were outside and looking at the port we were heading into. There was already a small crowd at the port, their cheers could be heard even from here.

I looked at the direction father was looking at and said, "Ah you mean the forest behind the port? I cut them down."

"You... cut... the forest? That forest... my grandfather... planted?"

"Yes, where else would I get all the timber?"

Eh? Father, why are you lying down on the floor so suddenly? Father, your mouth is foaming, are you okay? Oh! Is this what they call 'fainting with foaming mouth'?

Geez, I only took a quarter of the barony's timber supply. It's not like I cut down everything. Don't make such a big deal out of it. I'll replant everything, okay? Stop being so melodramatic over a bunch of trees.

Previous Chapter | Next Chapter

Read more »